Four Truths for a Weary Heart
By JASMIN HOWELL
Waiting on God requires the willingness to bear uncertainty, to carry within oneself the
unanswered question, lifting the heart to God about it whenever
it intrudes upon one’s thoughts.
Elisabeth Elliot
I have had to wait a long time for many things I yearned for, as I’m sure you have! My husband and I waited nine long years of marriage to have children, 13 long years to experience one natural pregnancy, 14 years to own the house we longed for, and the list could go on. And I’m absolutely certain that there will be more waiting in our future. Why?
Waiting seems to be a significant aspect of our lives and is designed by God for our good. Why else would there be verses like the following to encourage us? “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” (Ps. 27:14 NIV). But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. If it was, we wouldn’t need strength and courage as the psalmist mentions. I am now convinced that waiting is one of the greatest ways God shows His kindness, grows our faith, teaches our hearts to surrender, reveals His character, and reminds us that the story He is writing in our lives isn’t ultimately about us, but Him.
The story of how our first son Declan came into our lives is such a fun one to share because his arrival was an exclamation point after a season of frustration, disappointment, and heartache. My husband Mike and I had been married almost nine years and had never been able to have children of our own for reasons that are still a mystery. The wait felt excruciatingly long as I surrendered my desire to be a mother over and over and over again — often not happily. We were surrounded by prolific childbearing families who were growing in size as new children seemed to continually join the ranks. But we remained childless. Oh, the ache in my heart almost can’t be described.
Through a very long journey, we finally came to the place of surrendering our desires and trusted that if God chose not to give us children, He was still good and He still loved us. He just had a different — and better — plan for us.
Mere months after we had reached a place of peaceful acceptance, the adoption of our sweet son Declan came as a huge surprise and took our breath away completely! His arrival into our lives was swift and miraculous. The moment we held that little newborn in our arms and looked into the face of our long-awaited child, we were so grateful to the Lord that we had been asked to wait for this amazing story to unfold.
And to our shock and amazement (and everyone else’s, too), we naturally conceived four years later, after being married for 13 years. And, to add extra sweetness to what has felt like a bitter season at times, we have been recently blessed with another natural pregnancy. As I write this, I am three months pregnant with our third child. So here I am testifying to weary hearts around me that God has a plan to glorify His name in our waiting seasons.
Maybe you aren’t waiting to be married or to have children, but for something else entirely: a longed-for opportunity, answers to ongoing health issues, the resolution of a broken relationship, freedom from an addiction, healing from a deep loss. What is the thing your heart aches for?
I would love to encourage you with a few significant biblical truths that I have gleaned through the years — truths that give rest and peace to weary hearts worn out from waiting for answers. If we were sitting somewhere together enjoying a cold drink and having a heart-to-heart, this is what I would confidently tell you.
1. He Gives Us Grace to Wait
Our flesh wants its desires fulfilled instantly. Without the indwelling power of Christ giving us strength to endure a season of waiting, we will inevitably become discouraged, irritated, frustrated, and even angry. As Oswald Chambers wrote, “One of the greatest strains in life is the strain of waiting for God.”2 And if we find ourselves in a season of waiting — no matter if it’s been days, months, or years — that strain can mercifully lead us to experience the immeasurable grace God gives to wait in His strength.
In Latin, the word “grace” means favor or kindness. Can our straining seasons be the exact place God wants to demonstrate His kindness toward us? Absolutely. The indwelling life of Christ is an immense gift of kindness that He jealously guards within us! James writes that, “He jealously longs for the Spirit He has caused to dwell in us … He gives us more grace … Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and He will come near to you” (Jas. 4:5–8 NIV). These waiting seasons can draw us ever closer to God, while He also draws close to us. Resist the devil’s lies, and do not give way to the tempting bait of fear, anxiety, or hopelessness.
The Bible also promises that, “The one who calls you is faithful, and He will do it” (1 Thess. 5:24 NIV). So, if He has asked you to wait, know without a doubt that He is working out His perfect will concerning you, while also strengthening you to endure!
2. Waiting Leads to Growth
In my life, waiting has been the single most important tool that God has used to make my life a more fruitful place. A few qualities that have increased in my life as a result of waiting are:
Peace: trusting and resting in the sovereignty of God’s plans.
Patience: waiting has stretched and increased my faith that He is working, even if it takes longer than I want.
Faithfulness: learning to love God, not for His blessings and gifts, but for Himself alone.
Self-control: reigning in my desires and not giving way to every passion and inclination of my heart because I’ve learned His ways are best.
God has also used seasons of waiting to show me the things I love more than Him and to root them out of my life, which only serves to increase my love for Him as there is less of “me” and more of Him in my life. I’ve never regretted allowing Him to pry the idols from my grasp.
In addition, as I wait, I’ve learned to pray. When I submit my heart to Him, I have the privilege to watch Him answer prayers big and small. And I realize that having my attention turned to these things helps me see how truly good He is, and how much He loves me! I can’t reiterate enough how good waiting has been for my spiritual growth!
3. Waiting Reveals His Character
Seasons of waiting on God have often revealed that I don’t know as much about His character as I had thought. In the seasons that have spanned many years, my propensity was to doubt the love of God because it felt like He delayed so long. For example, it was hard for me to understand how making me wait for children could be anything but cruel and heartless. Perhaps you have had your own misgivings. But nothing about God’s character described in Scripture aligned with my wrong assumptions about Him which were largely derived from my feelings.
Digging into the Word of God in order to know Him more fully has provided more comfort than the fulfillment of any desire ever could. He has been so kind to use His Word to reveal wrong beliefs I had that were not true — and thus, were discouraging. I highly suggest opening God’s Word as your first turn if you are struggling. You’ll notice that I share a lot of verses from the Psalms. And that is because it is full of encouragement in this area!
Verses like Psalm 16:5–6 remind me that God gives what is good and right in season: “The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places…” (ESV).
And Psalm 18:30 reminds me that there is no flaw in His ways or in His character: “This God — His way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; He is a shield for all those who take refuge in Him” (ESV).
4. Ultimately, It’s Not About Us
God loves us all deeply and cares about the details of our lives! I know the depth of His love like I have never known it before — not because He has given me everything I have ever wanted — but because of waiting.
But sometimes while waiting, we can start to think that the wait is about us (consciously or not) and that He must be using this season to teach us something, to do something amazing in our lives. If we spend our lives repeating the common narrative, “It’s all about me,” then waiting on God will be so much harder because our deepest longing is not that He gets the praise He is so worthy of … it’s just about whether or not we got what we wanted from Him. Living in that headspace, where we see all of our experiences through the lens of our personal circumstances and the fulfillment of our desires, is a dangerous perspective — not to mention an unhappy one. I’ve wasted a lot of years in that mindset.
Rather than longing for Him to craft a story that will put us on a stage or make people look in amazement at our lives and be wowed, our hearts should long for others to see the amazing power of God at work in our circumstances and be wowed … by Him! The difference can seem small, but it changes our motivation at a deep level!
He is writing a story to display His power to the world. Are we willing to allow our lives to be that display? Even through the most painful journey? Each aspect of our lives is meant to bring Him glory. The more we grasp this, the less painful waiting is. We realize that His timing and His answers will always be perfect. And they are worth waiting for. If we miss this, we miss the opportunity to point our own hearts — and the hearts of those journeying with us — to the greatness of God.
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When we long for God to get the glory out of our lives, then we can say with the psalmist: “You are the God of my salvation; for You I wait all the day long” (Ps. 25:5 ESV). When our hearts long most for Him, whatever else our hearts might desire takes second place because we know with unwavering certainty that anything He is doing is worth waiting for. If you find yourself in a place of waiting, may you gain strength from Him and may your heart take courage that He does all things well. (See Mark 7:37.)
I assure you, your waiting will not be in vain. He has good things in store!
This article was originally published in Issue 43.
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